Distant Friends of Dorothy
We used to talk about random things, now we talk about The L Word.
Distant Friends of Dorothy
Balancing Books, Bullies, and Bedtime Jokes
What's the secret to rekindling a love for reading amidst the chaos of daily life? Join us as we unravel the layers of our favorite book series, uncovering hidden gems and complex character relationships that make each re-listening a rich experience, even for the fifth time! We also chat about prepping for an exciting upcoming event, where costume choices, makeup tips, and survival strategies like carrying power banks come into play, all while navigating the emotional rollercoaster of validating a medical appointment and saying goodbye to old technology filled with cherished memories.
Ever had to intervene in a child's sports practice? One parent shares their heart-wrenching experience dealing with a bully at their child's soccer practice, leading to a tense but necessary confrontation. Reflecting on our own childhood sports memories, we discuss the dynamics between competitive kids and those just wanting to have fun, and even share a few laughs over fashion faux pas like socks and sandals. We also touch on the bittersweet changes in the workplace, from the departure of a valued team member to the ongoing struggles in the teaching profession, all garnished with humorous anecdotes about quirky office decor.
As we wind down, we dive into our latest book recommendations, featuring thrilling reads by B.A. Paris and John Marrs, and share our excitement for futuristic narratives involving virtual reality parenting experiments. For a lighter note, we discuss the simple joys and challenges of cat ownership, the frustrations with TikTok's algorithm, and wrap up with some encouraging words before bed. This episode is a heartfelt blend of stories, practical advice, and lighthearted banter, promising an engaging listen for everyone.
Maybe we'll see, who knows, but welcome back.
Speaker 2:It's been a while. It's been a while right Listening to the book again with Lauren when we were driving to Vancouver and back. I'm trying to get her into it, but like we listen to it so infrequently, she forgets everything that's happening. Ah there, well, and it's hard to kind of it's there's, there's a lot there. It's really complicated, yeah.
Speaker 1:Yeah, it reading. I'm listening to it now for I don't know the fifth time I think, and and still there's shit that I don't even remember and I'm like I don't remember this last time but like so much more is making sense this time around, right?
Speaker 2:she's like if anybody did me the favor of offing harrow, I'd give them a friendship bracelet. And then in book book three, her and Ianthe, at the very end, are wearing friendship bracelets. Oh really, yeah, I haven't even thought about it.
Speaker 1:See, I only am re-listening to book one over and over and over again.
Speaker 2:Yeah, book one is the best of the three. Yeah.
Speaker 1:Anyways, now I can take my pants off, oh, but here's my question. Yeah, is, I don't know if I'm going to wear this. I might, because it's going to be hot, but if I wear this, do I wear this bra where I have boobs, or do I wear a?
Speaker 2:binder. I was going to say do you have a binder? I think a binder is a good choice If it's comfortable in the heat, I would fit.
Speaker 1:I'm generally more comfortable in a binder anyways.
Speaker 2:I think it would suit the look very good, perfect.
Speaker 1:And there we go. I am ready, my whole costume is ready, I've got my fucking uh makeup and shit. I went right through. It's gonna be a fantastic day. Oh also, I don't know if you can tell I'm burnt. Yeah, you can't tell. You can't really tell. You had a garage sale on the weekend and I got burnt. Oh, my goodness, that's terrible and by normal I need to gently. There we go. That was it. I just got shit in my hair. I'm getting a haircut on Thursday to just shave down the sides of my head. Oh cool, and then I can just box dive my hair that's such a fun.
Speaker 2:Look, well, you could just get the spray too.
Speaker 1:Yeah got my contacts but no glasses. I also got like I'm watching, like little things, I'm like how to survive comic con, um, and so I got two power banks that I will be keeping with me. Does your phone count pretty fast? Uh, it depends. Sometimes it dies, like in a few hours, and sometimes it doesn't. I think it's old I have. I have an se, so it's old. I got it in 2020, 2021, in like september, august, september of 2021, so it's old. Just fine, old things are okay old things are okay.
Speaker 2:I had an iphone like six plus for years and years and years and years and years. It's fine. I still have it in a drawer. It would still work. If I tried it. I was going to let Lauren use it. Then I remembered everyone I talked to in that six years. They're still on that phone. Those messages are still there. Those pictures are still there. Every message I ever sent my ex is there and I love Lauren, but I wouldn't be able to resist if I were her well, you can always just reset it yeah, but I have like 14 000 photos, oh fair, and have them saved in other locations.
Speaker 2:But maybe it's because I grew up with like photos on paper. But I'm just terrified that all those files are going to get deleted and then, like years of my life will be lost.
Speaker 1:That makes sense oh shit, I don't think you did. Oh, oh, I can't tell cold. Okay. Okay, here we go. We're going to put you right here, I'm here, Turn that light off, move it, callie, callie, move, cat, cat. I mean, you're so pretty, it's a pretty girl, it's girl, it's a 50, 50, 50 girl. That was it I had, like the whole setup so that I could show you my little, my little outfit. And now it's done and I don't have to do that anymore. There we go, okay, okay.
Speaker 2:so the last that we talked, uh, you were filling out a really long application yeah, I did so I have my appointment on saturday, like saturday coming up, yeah, but my doctor, I called them and I was like, hey, doctor, this place looks legit, but can you check it on the list of like validated, verified sources so I don't spend all this money and find out that it's not valid? And he's like I would need to meet with you first to talk to you about it first. Um, before you go. And I'm like, but you said last time you'd give me a recommendation and your, your nurse practitioner, called me and recommended a source that was totally fake, that got like a lot of bad reviews online and this one seems way more reliable. So then I have an option.
Speaker 2:So, like I can either reschedule reschedule my saturday appointment to sometime after the 26th, if I even can, or I can just pay the money and do it separately anyway, and then like bank on the fact that my doctor will see it as valid. Oh boy, like why do I need my doctor to see it as valid if I've already gotten the diagnosis from a different doctor? Why is it important that my doctor sees it as valid so that your doctor will prescribe you the medication? Aha, but this place you can only get medication through them. Oh, because they know how this works. You get the diagnosis and you fuck off, go back to your original doctor and they're trying to make money. Right, you pay 80 bucks a month and you get from them 80 bucks after insurance. I think.
Speaker 1:Yeah, I don't know, it just is 80 bucks because like depending on the medication, like if, if it's this is not like actual medical advice or anything like that, but um, like ritalin is completely covered. Like rapid release ritalin, old school ritalin is completely covered. You pay zero dollars, or I think I might. I have 80 coverage, so I think I pay like 12 or something. Um, for a month. Actually I think I get no, I get one month at a time, but most of that is even the dispensing fee, like so 80 a month. I mean, like I'm just, I'm cheap I think the medication will be covered.
Speaker 2:So just be 80 bucks a month to maintain your prescription. It's essentially blackmail. Yeah, that seems highly illegal. Yeah, and your waiver you have to agree not to uh get your prescription from anyone else, but I don't see how that's enforceable, like how can they stop?
Speaker 1:you seems like I said, it seems highly illegal, but maybe they just won't right, because? So the other thing is, with adhd medication they can only write you a prescription for three months at a time, so you have to see your doctor every three months. So if they find out that you went elsewhere, maybe they just won't write you another prescription.
Speaker 2:Yeah, but but that seems like they would have like a medical malpractice on their hands if your doctor is willing to write you a prescription based on their diagnosis, why would you need them anymore, right?
Speaker 2:I don't know there's a bunch of them. There's beyond adhd oh, this one, see, it was in psychology today. Oh, I think it's fairly legit. And like they use the same app to book their appointments that I book my um therapy with, oh, so they must. Like they use the same app to book their appointments that I book my therapy with, oh, so they must be certified with the same level. That, like, my actual therapist is yes.
Speaker 1:I'm moisturizing, I'm Vaseline-ing. Actually, completely honest, I'm putting Vaseline on a burn. Everybody thinks I'm crazy, but apparently it's really good for burns.
Speaker 2:I mean it's like Aquifer and vaseline and aquifer similar.
Speaker 1:Yeah, aquifer is just american vaseline. It's not yellow, well kind of. But um, I told my sister that I was putting vaseline on. She's like that's like putting butter on a burn. It doesn't work. And I'm like I don't think you're quite accurate. Like it's not that, I think it's going to stop the burn. Like the reason that Vaseline is such a good thing is because it's non-comedogenic, which means the molecules are so big it doesn't actually get absorbed into your skin. So all it does is create a barrier on the outside of your skin and then, as your body, like creates moisture, it just keeps it in yeah, I mean putting butter on, it might work really well, well apparently putting honey on burns is good because it has antibacterial shit, but I'm not gonna go walk around being sticky.
Speaker 1:But I need this burn to chill the hell out because I have to go to comcom and needs to not be a pain in my butt when I go to comicon. Um, and since I'm gonna be posting this, hopefully, uh, a general update of our lives. Um, I am now single because I know I talked about my girlfriend.
Speaker 2:Yes, that's true. This is the first pod we've done, isn't it so?
Speaker 1:this is the first one since then. So I am single. Everything comes to an end and sometimes people, just as much as you want things to work, don't work out. And sometimes people just don't match and that's okay. That's kind of all I got.
Speaker 2:It's okay if things don't work out sometimes it's the wrong person, sometimes it's just the wrong time, yeah, or like, sometimes it's just external factors that have nothing to do with your personality that just make it incompatible well, I think that's pretty much really kind of where it ended up being was.
Speaker 1:We're just like we could be the right people, but it's just kind of the wrong time and and that's okay. It's okay. So that's the thing. Um, yeah, I still haven't figured out where we went wrong with the l word when we were talking about it. I have to review.
Speaker 2:I haven't had time I'm busy, I haven't been busy, I just haven't done it yeah, I had.
Speaker 1:Well, we had the garage sale last weekend, so that was, and, oh my gosh, my poor little angel. What happened? He got so sick last monday. Uh-huh like, did I talk to you on wednesday? Did we have this last wednesday? Did we chat last wednesday?
Speaker 1:yeah, and he was sick he was yeah, oh yeah, because I told you about all the fun things that were happening. So he, yeah, he got sent home from school on monday, right, because I told you that I got called from school and my mother went and picked him up and right before she got there he had thrown up on the floor. The principal was cleaning it up and you were like, oh, that principal is really dedicated to his job, which he is. Um, so he was sick, sick, sick all week, so even past thursday he even, like, I think he threw up thursday night again and was still sick on friday and then, like, was feeling better on the weekend, so that was the but that sucked.
Speaker 1:And then we had the um garage sale on the weekend and then monday. Nothing happened on monday, but on tuesday we had, which was yesterday, we had soccer oh no, did he throw up on the field?
Speaker 2:no, he wasn't sick anymore but we're at soccer.
Speaker 1:We get to soccer and like there's a few kids there, like it wasn't the whole team, but like a at soccer. We get to soccer and like there's a few kids there, like it wasn't the whole team, but like a few. I think there was like seven kids there and like all the boys, all the kids, and they're all boys. There's no girl on his team, all the boys. They throw their water bottles in a pile and then they like go play and then they can like come back and drink their water bottles.
Speaker 1:Well, so my kid throws his water bottle in the pile and is going to go play and this other kid, like, comes up to the pile of water bottles, looks at my kid, looks at his water bottle, grabs it and throws it with this like intense, angry look on his face. Okay, I was like that's weird, but okay. And then I start watching and like usually I don't really actually pay attention that much during soccer, um, because it's when I get to read my book, um, but I started watching this time and I watched this kid and he would go up to my kid and he would like, like my kid would be holding the soccer ball and this kid would like go up to him and like smack the soccer ball out of his hand so it would go flying, so that my kid would have to go get it. Or like my kid would be like dribbling the soccer ball and this kid would come up and just like kick it away and I was like what the like?
Speaker 1:he's not doing it to other kids, he's only doing it to my kid. And I was like this is, why is this happening? And then, and so like for the first half hour because they're there for an hour the first half hour is drills and practice and the last half hour is game. Um, and so in this first half hour then I see him actually like grab my kid and throw him onto the ground and I was like that's weird and like luckily, my kid just thought he was playing. Really, he was like oh, ha, ha, ha ha. Then this kid does it again and I'm like this isn't good, like what is wrong with this kid? And then he did it a third time and nobody's stopping him. And like if my kid was doing that to some other kid, like the first time it happened, I'd be going up to him and being like hey, smarten up, you need to go make friends right now and then you're going to have some space between this kid that you obviously have an issue with. But like so he does this a third time and I'm mad. And so I get up and I walk onto the field and I point at him and I say, hey, you, if you throw him onto the ground one more time, we're going to have a problem. I don't know what to say, cause this is like a nine-year-old boy, like I can't like be, like I'm going to kick your ass. A nine-year-old boy, like we're going to have a problem. And then he goes oh well, well, he was doing this and this and this, and I said fine. And I looked at my kid. I said hey, leave him alone, give him some space, make sure there's three kids between you and him at all times. There you go, like what else do you want me to say to my kid? Because my kid's not instigating any of this? You are, you little shit. Um, and then like, but then, like this is, this is like 15 minutes into practice, and I felt bad because like I'm being that parent at a sock, at like a sports thing, and like being the overbearing parent, but like I was mad and so I.
Speaker 1:But I go and I sit back down and I'm panicking now because I'm like I don't know where his mom is or dad, but like I don't know where this his parents are. I don't know if they're gonna come and yell at me for yelling at their kid. But like I'm also feeling like if my kid was doing it and I didn't know, I would hope that another parent would kind of give him shit. Yeah, because like it takes a village kind of thing and like don't let my kid get away with shit, please. And so I'm panicking for the rest of soccer and I'm just like, oh my God, someone's going to come up and yell at me. But nobody did.
Speaker 1:And then at the end the coach came up and was like hey, you know, to my kid he's like hey, you're doing really good. I know that you're working really hard. I can tell that you've been working really hard. You're really understanding it, congratulations. And then he looks at me. He's like I'm really sorry that I didn't see what was going on. And I said it's okay, there's lots of kids like I. But like hey, like okay, you're not. Because he comes walking up and I'm thinking like I'm gonna get in shit from the coach no, I felt so guilty but he shouldn't have.
Speaker 1:Honestly, he's got like he's got a bunch of kids and they're all bouncing off the walls. Poor guy, um, but I just I couldn't, because all I'm thinking is like from the time when he was in hockey and some kid did the same thing but he slammed him onto the ice to the point that, like, my kid was like really hurt. So I'm panicked that this is that's going to happen again. But yeah, and then we left, and then a girl in my office her kid is on the same soccer team as my kid, but I couldn't remember what her kid's name was and I was like oh my gosh, was that the same kid?
Speaker 1:Like, did I just yell at my coworker's kid? I'm at work in the morning and I'm like talking about things, and then I looked at my coworker and I was like, uh, your kid's name is this right? She was like, yes, I was like, oh, okay, cause the kid was some other name, like your kid name is Jimmy and, and the kid's name was was Brandon or something. So Brandon is the one that was picking up my kid. Okay, good, I said, uh, cause I I kind of yelled at Brandon last night and she's like Brandon's a jerk.
Speaker 1:Good, I was like, oh, validation, she's like he runs around, he screams, he talks, mean to everybody and his parents are never there. I was like, oh, okay, okay, okay, as long as I'm not doing things that are going to get me in trouble with other parents. Um, and yeah, yeah, she's like other parents were probably thinking the same thing and you just actually acted on it. Oh my god, okay, good for me or no. My sister said that to me, I don't know anyways. So, but I had messaged my one friend about this as it was happening, because I needed to be doing something. I was so like, oh, my god, I'm gonna get in trouble. So I'm like messaging my one friend. She didn't talk to me, like she never got back to me, but then she's just messaged me and she said she was at a baby shower. So whatever, children suck.
Speaker 2:That's the moral of that story don't say that we're trying so hard to have one no, your own kid doesn't suck.
Speaker 1:It's other people who can't parent for shit and leave their nine-year-old to just roam the streets alone.
Speaker 2:Maybe mcfd should get called no, my mom never came to any of my games. Well, but how did you get there? Good point, kids, moms like it was probably a carpool situation. My dad would come like half the time. Yeah, yeah, he'd watch me pick clovers instead of play. Uh-huh, yeah, he'd always be nice to me about it. Equipment in the back of his car at all times, just in case I really wanted to practice. No, I do the same. You know what's in the back of my car right now? A soccer ball. You know what? I don't play soccer, but like what, if I'm stuck in a field and someone wants to play a game, we don't have a toy I have, you know I'm just a good car hostess.
Speaker 1:I'm just saying I just really think they should have two groups in soccer. They should have the group of kids who really want to play soccer and they're really competitive, and then they need a group of kids that just kind of want to have fun and just pick clovers and catch flies. Because when you, what's that?
Speaker 2:We haven't now. I had to sub PE yesterday so again and like another teacher had started it off for me because I didn't know what they were doing. It was very confusing and I was like I don't fucking know what it is. So they started it off for me. So I got there and she's like so what we did is all the assholes are over there, not kids who are really into football. All the little assholes are over there and she's's like but it's okay, they love each other because they're all little assholes together. She's like if they went over to those kids who are like playing who knows what with a ball and just I don't know, flouncing around having fun, yeah, um, she's like that would start fights. But since they're all assholes, they don't fight each other. And she's been a pe teacher for 24 years and like I'm a little in love with her.
Speaker 2:Oh my god, what a beautiful thing. That's so great. All the weirdos who just like having a great time. Honestly, they're having way more fun than the asshole. Uh-huh. Also, socks and sandals is so cool right now. So all of them are running around in their stocking feet with no shoes on the fucking socks and sandals.
Speaker 1:It kills me.
Speaker 2:I remember giving mr hill shit yeah, wearing socks and sandals I straight up love it because socks and sandals is the most comfortable thing ever.
Speaker 1:It is but like I can't do it, I have perfect sandals to wear socks with and I still can't do it. I do it every single day. Nope, oh, I decorated my office. Yeah, yeah, I put up some wonderful little. I have a, I have a cork board, and so I printed off a bunch of little like inspirational quotes and I put them on my cork board in a nice little design, a different font. So I printed off two copies of these, so the black and white ones I've already put up on the board, and then I have another copy that I'm just gonna color, and as I color them I'll replace them on the cork board. Did you get it yet?
Speaker 1:I sent it to you oh I was just like why did my watch go off? It's because of me.
Speaker 2:There's eight of them oh, it is pretty, let's see. No cheers, all tears. This is no time to be sober, turns out, these are my monkeys and this is my circ. That's the the worst. I feel that a lot. My favorite essential oil is chloroform. I like that one At this point. If a clown invited me to the woods, I'd just go Live, laugh. Toaster bath. I want to cry, but I have shit to do. Well, apparently rock bottom has a fucking basement.
Speaker 1:I think it's funny and we're gonna find out if my boss thinks it's funny. And we're going to find out. If my boss thinks it's funny because she's doing a site visit tomorrow, I think it's okay because my camera, when I'm on my like professional calls, doesn't face this in any way. It's the opposite way. So the only people who will see this are my direct reports. Okay, so I think it's okay, but we'll find out. She might get mad at me.
Speaker 2:I'm sure.
Speaker 1:Also one of my workers, quit.
Speaker 2:Wait just quit.
Speaker 1:Yeah, so she walked in yesterday and quit. I'm actually really sad because, like she's like a really good worker now and she, but it's, it's not that she's quitting, she's not quitting me because I know like when, when you quit a job, you don't quit a job, you quit a manager. Right, she's not quitting me. Okay, she's moving to camp loops oh, she's not quitting, she's moving yeah.
Speaker 1:So it's okay, she's not quitting me, she's actually quitting the job and she's getting a job like probably outside, like she might get a job within government, but maybe not. Maybe she might get a job within government, but maybe not. Maybe she'll get a job outside government, but yeah. So, uh, two weeks she's gone in two weeks, no, which sucks for me, but it is what it is I mean we're hiring, we're very much hiring us too.
Speaker 1:Nobody wants to be a toc, which is honestly understandable I, oh god, I don't know if I could do it all over again, if I would be a teacher or not, I don't know it's pretty tough.
Speaker 2:It's pretty tough. I'm really fucking sick of it right now. Oh no well, this time of year we're all just barely limping, dying along yeah, I missed crazy hair day.
Speaker 1:I missed crazy hat day. I totally wasn't even a good mom this week and forgot about all the special fucking days that they have the last two weeks before fucking school is over. Why did they do that?
Speaker 2:hey, it just ramps the kids up, I swear it honestly does and like they don't need any help.
Speaker 1:No, but it is what it is. He survived next year. Next year, I'll do better. Next year I'll be settled. So, like I know that you were worried about getting a job, though they don't need any help, no, but it is what it is. He survived Next year. Next year, I'll do better. Next year I'll be settled. So, like I know that you were worried about getting a job though, so tell me about that.
Speaker 2:I still don't have one. Yeah, it's a really short story. There were two jobs I was eligible for, but I didn't get a call, which means that someone in band two or band one applied for them, and that's just what it is. More jobs came out today and I'm not eligible for any of them. They're like french immersion, math, science, special education or elementary special education. Why aren't you eligible for french immersion? Because I'm not. But you have a bilingual certificate. Sure, I have a degree in french, but, um, I took the test and it only certified me for a grade nine core. So I can't do any french immersion and I can only do like seven, eight, nine, four. That's bullshit. Why? You're smart, yeah, but you lose it if you don't use it. So I don't know if you had to read a whole thing and carry on a conversation in french, can you still do it?
Speaker 1:no, uh, I can read a whole thing and carry on a conversation in French. Can you still do it? No, I can read, but I can't carry on a conversation. No, I can't speak French.
Speaker 2:Yeah, but that's a big part of being an immersion teacher. And like, how are you going to correct the kid French if you don't know the grammar rules? How are you going to like to know everything that's feminine or masculine? I don't. I went to physio for the first time. Tell me more about that.
Speaker 2:It's so awkward. Like it's so awkward and like of course it's because I hurt my foot. So this stranger has to touch my bare foot and like first of all my hands and feet. Like the palms of my hands and the palms of my feet, I guess underside of my feet sweat when I'm nervous. So like the underside of my hands and feet are like sweaty. So she's touching my sweaty naked foot with her bare hands, no gloves or nothing. And then like one huge half of my toenails gone because I cut it off, because it was, you know, infected or whatever. So like I'm just a weird, toenail-less, fucking sweaty ass, toe, foot freak and she's touching me with her hands and that was just so weird.
Speaker 2:Did not enjoy it, but I did enjoy it. She did an ultrasound on it, which is not to see what's inside of it, they just like blast sonic rays at it and it's supposed to be good. And then they did like an electrical thing. So they like put electrodes on it and electrocute my foot for 20 minutes straight. Oh, it's actually really cool. She's like when it gets comfortable. Turn it up because you get used to it. Right after about 10 minutes you get used to it. So then I turned it up pretty high and then my toes started like moving involuntarily. So like every time the electricity would surge, my toe would go and like veer off my big toe, veer off from the other toes, and be like I want to be free and it was weird to watch. I didn't have a phone, so to sit there for 20 minutes, nothing's going on, no one's around me, no phone, no distraction. I had to meditate. Against my will, you weren't allowed to even like bring a book no, I had stuff.
Speaker 2:It was just too far away and I was hooked up to the foot electrocutor oh, I was trying to look stuff on my phone doesn't even work.
Speaker 2:Lauren's been gone for two days. She went down to seattle to go try and get pregnant, oh yeah, so she just got back and she's working on the bridge. Right, she's got a fair bit done. How did she do it alone? How did she do it alone? Yeah, she took her car, drove down there, slept in her car, drove back a little bit. Yeah, she said that I don't have to go with her anymore if I don't want to. I think I've proven myself as a partner enough that she's like it's fine, you don't have to, which is good, because it was really annoying. I mean, I love her, but it was a lot for no reason and I don't know just don't know.
Speaker 1:He's technically in grade three but like I'd swear like he's still at like a grade one reading level, which is slightly frustrating but, he's getting better and like I've been encouraging him.
Speaker 1:First off, I buy him all the comics that he wants and he's, instead of just looking at the pictures, he's actually started reading them. But then I'm also like, like he's got all these like video games that he plays and like, like, like he's got all these like video games that he plays and like, mommy, come read the video game. Mommy can read what the screen says. Uh, and I've just kind of stopped doing that and I'm like buddy, you need to learn how to read. So if you want to play this game, you need to know how to read. So read um in a nice way. But like I think it's helping. What was that?
Speaker 2:oh, um, kareena's telling me I have to change the dates of our camping trip. So just changing the dates of our camping trip. When are you going camping? Well, it'll just be a lot easier if I send you a picture. I have a busy little summer yeah, you do.
Speaker 1:Are you still around for when we're there for comic-con? Yeah, okay, not that like I'm the most important person in the world, but like nice to know, let's take a little lookerini, uh, which camping.
Speaker 2:Okay, so there's a few. Yes, yes, there are. So I'm doing Queers Go camping on the 28th in Chilwa and then I have a week off where Haley may or may not be living with us, depending on her situation, and we're like getting this suite prepared downstairs. I did all the landscaping. It looks really nice. You probably don't remember what it looked like before. The whole front area of the downstairs. Well, there's a lot of plants. Well, it's what it looks like. After I I took so much shit out of there looks super nice now oh holy crap.
Speaker 2:Yeah, like it took me like four hours. I got rid of all of the weeds and I took out all the gardens and I planted all these herbs and tomatoes, for like it'll be more attractive to get a tenant in september do you even need to be attractive to get a tenant, though? Not me personally, the suite, so like we also have to like clear out the suite, right yeah?
Speaker 1:okay, so, but what's changing for your calendar?
Speaker 2:well, we have someone related to us I don't know if she's an aunt or a second aunt or something, something but uh, she has a house on christina lake. It's only a couple houses down from, like, uh, where my family's lake house was. Okay, I'll have to do this again. Okay, kx1, 12 and fuck, oh, I don't have to put that one. Okay, sorry, I have to pay like more for my car to be at the parking site than like anything else. Cool, I forgot what I was saying. What was I saying?
Speaker 2:Oh, so little bit cousin-y thing invited Karina last summer to go stay at the house in the lake on the Christina Lake and Karina went and she said she was super nice and not weird and creepy like my whole family is. So then when she invited me via email a couple days ago, karina was like do it, so I'm going to go stay with her and Karina and CJ and maybe Lauren for like a few days. So that changes the dates of our camping. Sorry, that was like a whole effort to get that out, but in my defense I came home with a bad headache and so I had half a gummy. I'm quite sensitive to them, so I just get extra, extra forgetful, and I'm already forgetful to start with.
Speaker 1:Sorry, I just read a book.
Speaker 2:Tell me about your book.
Speaker 1:It's because you said about forgetfulness and it's a book. Hold on, okay, so it's a book. It's this author, so his name is john mars. Okay, and nope, I'm lying. No wait, am I lying? I am lying, sorry, it's not john mars. This is ba paris and the first book that I read by this person. I don't know if it's a man or a woman, but um, first book that I read was called behind closed doors and it's about domestic violence. Okay, super interesting. And then the next one that I read is called the breakdown and it's about like, um, it's about like early onset dementia woman who's in like her 30s and her being forgetful. And like in her 30s, yeah, well, her mom and you find this out early in the books was like I'm not spoiling anything, um, but her mom passed away at like 46 or something from early onset dementia, so, and then like, so it's possibly genetic, blah, blah, blah anyways.
Speaker 1:So, uh, you talk about being forgetful and I, like I just finished it, literally like a couple hours ago actually in that world uh-huh, yeah, I know, but it was a really good book and like I don't know, I'm like over the past couple years I've like tried to get back into reading a couple times, so I used to like read so much. I used to like read all the fucking time and I had a kid and couldn't do it because there's no fucking time. But like he's old enough now that I can kind of do it a little bit, and so I am, and I'm really like I missed reading so much and I'm into like like, yeah, like I I was into like dystopian, but like now I'm also into this. This is like thriller and like just really loving that.
Speaker 1:And so like BA Paris is the one and I'm reading through some of theirs right now, but like I'm also reading like this other author, john Mars, and so John Mars is like sorry, john Mars is also thrillers, but they're like kind of in the future and or not even all of the future, but some of them are in the future, but um, or not even in the fall of the future, but some of them are in the future, but like let's see, um, right, so there's this one, what lies between us, and just it's, it's, it's. It's just, it's really good and it's all like like people like mentally not doing well and like the shit that they would do. And then the other one that I just read of his was the one.
Speaker 2:So it's like set in the future and like, oh, hold on okay, while you're holding on, I'm gonna refill my drink where you at okay, okay, okay, sorry my kid.
Speaker 1:Okay. So this, uh, what was I all right? So this one. So there was kind of there was a I think there was a black mirror episode, maybe was there? Yes, there was. There was a black mirror episode where you like submitted to this like dating app and then it like counted down to the time that you met your. Yeah, okay, so in this book, um, you submit your dna and then it just matches your dna to another person and they are the one and you're attracted to their pheromones. Blah, blah, blah. Um, but yeah, so that's the basis of this one was that you're attracted to their pheromones, but they're like, they're sinister things afoot oh of course, and it's just it was really good.
Speaker 1:I'm like I thought it would be silly, but like I genuinely liked it and like I don't know, I'm really excited to get back into like really back into reading the amount of books that I've read in the past. I don't know three weeks. I've read more books in the last three weeks than I have in the last. I don't know. Probably eight years, not including the giddy in the ninth shit how many are we talking?
Speaker 2:how many books in the last three well, let's see my books.
Speaker 1:Where's my books? Books, and I've been reading on my little um, whatever. This is e-reader, my e-reader, which is e-ink, so it's better for you than an lcd screen. Okay, one, two, three, four, five, no, wait, four, because I haven't read that one yet. It's my next one. Five, uh, six, seven, seven, seven books in three weeks you're dissociating shush quiet you. I've just really enjoyed it, okay? No, I just what's that?
Speaker 2:I dissociate too my favorite.
Speaker 1:Well, like I'm also, so also really easy to just download, like buy a book and then you just read it and like, so I have, like I have my e-reader and then I have this thing here where it it holds my book or my e-reader, and so I just put it in there, and then when I'm laying down, it holds my e-reader and so I just put it in there and then when I'm laying down, it holds my e-reader at the perfect angle for me to be laying down in bed reading without touching it. That's fucking yeah. And then I have the little like contraption that I clip onto my e-reader and then I hold the remote and then I press the button and it flips the pages for me. So I don't even have to like touch the e-reader to flip pages. So I like it's how I'm falling asleep now and I think my sleep has actually gotten better because I'm not looking at my phone to fall asleep, I'm reading.
Speaker 1:And, like, the e-reader that I have is not shitty, but it's the smallest one you can get. It's itty bitty. I don't know if I can tell you how itty bitty it is, but it's itty bitty. Tell you how itty bitty it is. It's itty bitty and um, but it has a backlight. Okay, but it's, it's a backlight, it's not like an lcd screen, it's, it's a backlight, so it's still like you're reading like ink, but it's just backlit and it so it's easy on your eyes, you can adjust the brightness and the battery like lasts forever in a day and like if I wake up in the middle of the night, I just turn my e-reader back on and I just so.
Speaker 1:The next book that I want to read by him comes out, I think in july, and it's called the family experiment and like. So, basically, like okay, so it's like you put on a virtual reality, like virtual reality suit and glasses so that you can feel everything and see everything and hear everything, and you're really in the virtual reality world. Um, and a bunch of couples or singles or whatever uh, I think there's like eight or ten or whatever um, enter into this competition like reality tv.
Speaker 1:They're all gonna wear these suits and be immersed in this world where they have a child, a baby, brand new baby okay and then, like they have to like raise this baby and the baby in the virtual world, the, the growth is accelerated or whatever. So, like, by the time they're a year old, they're really like an adult or something, I don't know anyways. And then, like they're, they're in this virtual world with their virtual baby and then the, the audience is the rest of the world, and you get to like vote as an audience member on shit and like, basically, like somebody out of this group wins and whoever wins gets to go through fertility treatments for free, or something.
Speaker 2:Okay, I can see how that's contracted now.
Speaker 1:Yeah, but it's going to get really fucked up because the audience votes on shit to do the family so like I'm really excited for that one to come on and I just can't. Man, I'm just like, yay, I don't know.
Speaker 2:Yes, I'm dissociating more power to you I just do a tiktok.
Speaker 1:Well, that's it. Tiktok was getting boring, yeah it kind of is.
Speaker 2:Yeah, I was getting like frustrated with tiktok.
Speaker 1:I think every once in a while I find one that I liked, but like I, just I, I think I is. Yeah, I was getting like frustrated with tiktok. I think every once in a while I find one that I liked, but like I, just I, I think I was feeling I was feeling the algorithm a bit too much. I was like conscious of how much it was trying to suck me in and I got frustrated. Or maybe the algorithm just fucked up and that's just where I'm at. What did you send me? Oh, it's a picture of lauren.
Speaker 2:Oh, yeah, I'm creeping on her. Oh, that's out the window, but she looks like she's having fun she's building a bridge.
Speaker 1:Oh yeah, she's happy.
Speaker 2:Life is good building a bridge like bridge not to tear up with you. No, that's too depressing. I just sent you the bridge oh, kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty.
Speaker 1:Oh, holy shit, it looks all like professional and shit. She's building a bridge. She really kind of is yeah, there's no guardrails well, not yet.
Speaker 2:What if somebody jumps off? I honestly felt a little squidgy when I was on it. Yeah, I could see that it's not very tall. It was tall like the bridge, isn't that tall? Oh, but it's probably like eight feet, and that's enough to make me nervous.
Speaker 1:Hey, a fall from even a couple of feet can kill you. Really, if you don't fall right, like come on, you just like, fell back, like if you're even standing, you just fall straight backwards onto like concrete, you're dead. Smashy, smashy, true, true I think. I think callie's actually losing, why she just looks small, but maybe it's wishful thinking. Like, starting at like 4 45 in the, she whines.
Speaker 1:Until I feed her, I don't feed her until seven. I literally I put in headphones and I put on a podcast or I put on a police interrogation and I listen to that so that I don't have to listen to her whine. We're kidding. But if I feed her earlier, then she's going to get used to getting fed earlier and that's going to get earlier and pretty soon. Then she's going to get used to getting fed earlier, and that's going to earlier and pretty soon. Like it's just there's no, no, like, it's easy as far as like the after work meal, because I literally walk in the door and one of the first things that I do when I walk in the door is is feed the cat, of course, which they know. Yeah, so like, but they don't get any food until I get home. So it's, but in the morning.
Speaker 2:She's just so fucking annoying yeah, lily just yowls, and I've recently discovered that she loves chicken. So whenever I eat chicken she just freaks out and just like screams, like if a cat could scream meow. She scream meows until I give her some of my chicken, and then she'll just stand beside me while I'm eating and just like tap me on the shoulder every once in a while, be like, hello, give me your chicken. And then it doesn't work. So she'll walk around to the other side and then just tap me gently on the shoulder trying to get my chicken. It's terrible.
Speaker 1:I will say I don't know how this happened. I'm very thankful for it, though. My cats won't eat any human food. That's good. They won't. They don't beg for food and they won't even eat treats out of my hand. I have to put the treat on the floor in front of them for them to even consider eating it maybe, or even better, in their, in their food dish. Then they're really all over it. So I'm like you think, thank, thank goodness, like I have those little, like those squeezy things, like it's a little tube, and you squeeze them. Um, I have to squeeze it onto their food dish. They won't eat it, just me squeezing it up. They, they want it on their food dish. They won't eat it out of hands that's so silly, they're fucking weird cat.
Speaker 1:But I can get like mr titters definitely won't, and never, never, never. I can get callie to eat the squeezy things sometimes and if I can get her to eat a little bit then I'll also get her to like go into the automatic litter box and sit in there and then I'll feed her while she's sitting in there just to make her, like, hopefully, use it a little bit, because I have the automatic litter box and then I have the regular litter box right beside it. She uses the regular litter box just in the ass, because then I have to scoop it. But I just scoop it into the automatic litter box and then let it do its thing. That work does, but like it's a thousand dollar fucking litter box and she's not even using it. She used to, but she's so fat yeah, she's too fat for it. Maybe when she gets skinnier she'll fit it better, maybe, yeah, who knows? Cats are weird, kids are weird, everything's weird.
Speaker 2:That's just the way it is, life is weird. That being said, you still make a phenomenal Gideon.
Speaker 1:Thank you, hopefully I can find somebody who has issues and will want to. No, I can't even do anything in Kelowna because I got my kid.
Speaker 2:No, you can't. You can make googly eyes. I want there to be a live action and I want Jod to be Taika Waititi. So much, what, what, what, what. You know the actor, what actor? Taika Waititi or whatever, I don't know who that is. Oh, for fuck's sake, he was Hitler in Jojo Rabbit. He is Blackbeard in Our Flag Means Death. It, he is blackbeard in our flag, means death. He's maori and hilarious and a director and a writer and fucking, so, so funny, and also, you know, from the right geographic region, although she said she didn't want their accents to be maori, because it's hard to take yourself seriously. It's hard to be dramatic. I also.
Speaker 1:Just need her to hurry up and finish the last book for fuck's sake, it was supposed to be out last year.
Speaker 2:Oh, I know this day. As far as I know, there's no release date.
Speaker 1:I can't believe. Is it unhealthy the amount of obsession I have with the book?
Speaker 2:No, and like I've waited so long because nobody would read it with me. It was nighttime now it happened fast, nobody would read it. And happen fast, nobody would read it. And so I asked, person after person, after person after person, and they're like that sounds weird, I don't have time, I don't want to learn about lesbian necromancers and I was honestly at my wit's end when I foisted upon you. I wouldn't hate it. So the fact that you're as obsessed as I am is so fucking validating and gratifying.
Speaker 2:I love this book. I love every single character. I'm trying to listen to it with Lauren and all I can think of is, oh my God, it's Palamedes. I always called them Palamedes, palamedes and Camilla, and I love them so much. And then, every time Ianthe does anything, I'm like, oh, you're so bad, I love you. And Harrow Harrow's such a little snark, such a little snark, such a little snark. She finds her in her little bone cage in the basement and she's like. I was resting my eyes like so fucking unconvinced. Oh my god. And I love that.
Speaker 2:Gideon's idea of revenge was to unbutton all the buttons on her clothes and do them back up. One mismatch, oh great, it's so good. And then I saw online that somebody made a fake production of Frontline Titties of the 5th or something and it looked very funny and very real and I liked it and I would totally buy that merch. I want merch. I looked on Etsy for it and it's stupid. I'm not like not considering getting a lock tomb tattoo. If you ever want to get matching tattoos, I would so be into getting like a skull from like one of the houses or like anything. I think it'd be really cool. There's so much imagery to work with let's do it.
Speaker 1:Let's do it. When I come down, I'm there in two weeks. Let's do wait. Can we go see clay? Wait, was his name clay? His name wasn't clay. What was his name?
Speaker 2:owen, oh yeah, I can ask owen. Yeah, he what oh?
Speaker 2:as he continued no, no, he has a place in in west bank too. So I went to get my hair fixed because it was looking raggedy and the only place I could find that was queer owned that was anywhere, because my hairdresser is busy. She's working on a movie. Um, was this place the rose and the raven, or whatever? And I already like it because it sounds like edgar allen poe. And then I find out that it's actually a hair salon slash tattoo studio and it's owens, so like he's the dude so like, maybe hypothetically, like saturday afternoon, ish, okay, what day?
Speaker 2:is it?
Speaker 1:I, I don't know. Okay, wrong, he's probably booked. It's so close, it's the 22nd.
Speaker 2:It'd have to be a small one, though, because, like I don't want um this summer, it's hard with a tattoo. I would fucking love that, though. I mean I'd love to have a bunch of them.
Speaker 1:Fuck it, just for fun. Don't know what, I don't know something. Just I need something here now. This is like I can't show you, but you know where they are, so like then the star ends here. So then I need something here now to keep the little line out okay, maybe I'll have to try this one.
Speaker 2:I couldn't find where to do it, so I'm just going straight to owen frick tattoos he did such a good job he did.
Speaker 1:I mean, like the only places where where it looks like it's like a little bit wiggly is where I know I was talking and moving. It's on me, a hundred percent on me. What would you want to get? I don't know something for giddy in the night, because I like her so much like there's so much you can get.
Speaker 2:You get like a long sword. You could get like a long sword, look cool. Um a skull. There's so much you can get. You could get like a longsword. You could get like a longsword would look cool. A skull. There's words, but I never like words. An arm for Ianthe.
Speaker 1:It's like a bone arm.
Speaker 2:No, I like Gideon. Fuck Ianthe, what would you get for Gideon? I don't know. We do bones, motherfucker. No, do you like other new shorts? Before, yeah, I was Okay, I'm gonna just like inquire and then I gotta go to bed because I've had like some real shitty sleeps. Oh, I can't because there's like a lot of pillows. I'll have to do some Googling and try it tomorrow, okay, but yeah, like honestly, honestly, I need to be in bed, like stat. Okay, I went to bed at 8 30 yesterday and it's not open enough. I'm so fucking tired. So, my beautiful baby, we're gonna bed, okay you go to bed.
Speaker 1:I'm gonna drink some water and then read some of my book and take out my contacts and go to sleep. That sounds lovely, Because I don't have anybody who I share the bed with, so it's just me myself and my cat.
Speaker 2:That's kind of convenient, william. And there's no snuggles, that's true. I only snuggle for five minutes and then I'm like, get off me, I'm going to sleep.
Speaker 1:Pretty much, it's too hot.
Speaker 2:Yeah, and they're all like clingy and sticky. I get, I like one little body part. I got like one like our knees touch or something and nothing else like toes.
Speaker 1:Yeah, well toes, no okay, but like a foot on a like feet ish.
Speaker 2:I know you don't like feet, but like I'm fine with feet touching you play footsie all you want, and then next time I tell you about the book that I'm listening to, called made. Have you heard of it? Wait, what mistakes were made made. Have you heard of it? Wait, what mistakes were made. I have not heard of it. About a girl who hooks up with an older lady during like a long weekend and then it turns out it's her best friend's mom. Okay, but like.
Speaker 1:Can you do me a favor? Can you read one chapter one?
Speaker 2:chapter. That's it. I'm unnamed midwife. Yeah, they're by my bed. I haven't read any books. I'm not like reading six other books and ignoring yours. I have not read a book.
Speaker 1:Just read one chapter. You don't need to read the rest. Just one chapter, that's it.
Speaker 2:Manipulative girl. You know that as soon as I read one chapter, I'm in so like yes, I will.
Speaker 1:But like I don, but like I don't want to, until report cards are done, which is monday, so it's not that long. I mean, like, to be fair, I read an entire the, the first book I think I read in like a day and a half. Oh yeah, it's, it's big type, it's big, it's big font, it'll be fine. Yeah, well, like, and then, and then we can commiserate over it because it's dystopian and and there's like there's, there's, it's kind of gay, like not overtly gay, but like kind of gay.
Speaker 1:And then, as it goes on, there's, there's, it's kind of gay, like not overtly gay, but like kind of gay. And then, as it goes on, there's like trans shit and stuff that goes on, and like, I mean like there's a little bit of gay stuff that goes on in the first one, I guess, like, but that's because, like, there's nobody left in the world and it is what it is. Yeah, just one chapter, just read one chapter and then you'll know the first chapter, you'll know if you want to actually read the book yeah, I'm sure I will like it seems good.
Speaker 2:I read the back. It looks right up my alley. It's just do I have time to invest in a book or a book series? A day and a half?
Speaker 1:yeah, but I don't have a day and a half okay, but also like the books are fine on their own, like you don't have to read the series to be satiated I know, I know me.
Speaker 2:I don't want to get into something if I can't finish it, because it'll be really unsatisfying and distracting. Oh, it finishes.
Speaker 1:It finishes. I swear it finishes Like the. Okay, so the first book is one time. The second book is like 50 years later, after report cards I know they were report cards.
Speaker 2:Because their due date is serious and I don't want to miss it.
Speaker 1:Kids don't.
Speaker 2:Like I don't like that. No, they do. Okay, I love you. Get some sleep so I can be energetic to teach a bunch of kids tomorrow.
Speaker 1:I need to be energetic to lead my direct reports, as I I don't know what's going to happen. Maybe I'll quit, who knows?
Speaker 2:You got this. You're going to make it through. It's going to be okay.
Speaker 1:Okay, you have a wonderful sleep. Everything's going to be fine. Your doctor's going to do okay. Everything will be fine. It will. Okay, you have a wonderful sleep. Everything's going to be fine. Your doctor's going to do his thing. It is Lauren's going to get pregnant. Everything's going to be fine.
Speaker 2:And I'll get a job next year. Look up some Noctum tattoo inspiration and send pics to me. Yes, absolutely All right. Okay, love you, lots Love.