Ever felt like Dorothy, tossed into a whirlwind of life's demands and enchantments? This week, my co-host and I whirl through a kaleidoscope of topics, from the dark origins of children's classics like Oz to the pressing issues of modern parenthood. We reminisce about the simpler times of baking cheesecakes with friends, only to be pulled back by the gravity of a friend's life-threatening medical scare. It's a chat loaded with laughter, life lessons, and the occasional existential quandary, offering a slice of life as rich and varied as the cheesecake we made.
Join us as we meander through conversations that touch on everything from the evolving language of gender identity to the timeless traditions of Easter. We'll share a moment of communal mourning for the victims of a recent tragedy and find solace in the nostalgic embrace of vintage video games. But it's not all heavy hearts and retrospective musings; get ready for some practical advice on preventing boiled eggs from cracking and how to juggle the demands of academic achievements with the joys of raising little ones.
Prepare to ride an emotional rollercoaster as we cover the peculiarities of pet dental care, the hilarity of award mix-ups, and the nitty-gritty of Canadian government workers' paychecks. We'll open up about personal accolades in teacher education, the quirks of family traditions, and the very real concern of managing finances with the deductions that come out of our hard-earned pay. It's a conversation that's as diverse as our lives themselves—a mix of professional insights, personal reflections, and those candid moments that make you chuckle and nod in agreement.
Ever felt like Dorothy, tossed into a whirlwind of life's demands and enchantments? This week, my co-host and I whirl through a kaleidoscope of topics, from the dark origins of children's classics like Oz to the pressing issues of modern parenthood. We reminisce about the simpler times of baking cheesecakes with friends, only to be pulled back by the gravity of a friend's life-threatening medical scare. It's a chat loaded with laughter, life lessons, and the occasional existential quandary, offering a slice of life as rich and varied as the cheesecake we made.
Join us as we meander through conversations that touch on everything from the evolving language of gender identity to the timeless traditions of Easter. We'll share a moment of communal mourning for the victims of a recent tragedy and find solace in the nostalgic embrace of vintage video games. But it's not all heavy hearts and retrospective musings; get ready for some practical advice on preventing boiled eggs from cracking and how to juggle the demands of academic achievements with the joys of raising little ones.
Prepare to ride an emotional rollercoaster as we cover the peculiarities of pet dental care, the hilarity of award mix-ups, and the nitty-gritty of Canadian government workers' paychecks. We'll open up about personal accolades in teacher education, the quirks of family traditions, and the very real concern of managing finances with the deductions that come out of our hard-earned pay. It's a conversation that's as diverse as our lives themselves—a mix of professional insights, personal reflections, and those candid moments that make you chuckle and nod in agreement.
Hello and welcome back. Welcome back to Distant Friends with Dorothy. I am Dorothy. No, I am Karen, actual Karen. On the Tiki Taki, you're Doris, what?
Speaker 2:would that make?
Speaker 1:me. I feel like the straw man. You would not be, toto. Oh, the straw man? Yeah, maybe. Well, let's see who is it. There's a scarecrow, there's the cowardly lion, and there's the munchkins and there's the flying monkeys. Oh yeah, I mean like so, my child, I'm reading him the Wizard of Oz stories. They are seriously messed up.
Speaker 2:Just saying Like not what you remember.
Speaker 1:Well, like I never read them, I just watched the movie. Expected, not expected, I mean.
Speaker 2:I didn't read them either. Are they that bad?
Speaker 1:There's just there's a lot. There's just a lot, lot there, and like it just feels like something maybe a teenager should read and maybe not an eight-year-old boy. So we've switched over to Harry Potter, but we're I also can't finish Harry Potter. Like we're on book four and I'm like we can't read past book four. I don't even know if we should finish book four before it has some stuff at the end. It does. I'm like, oh my gosh, um, is he gonna be like able to handle this? I don't know, because, like I also know what I was into when I was his age, but also, apparently that wasn't a good thing, so not great. And I have to be all bright eyed and bushy tailed for work tomorrow. Well, doesn't?
Speaker 1:that sound like the most fun thing ever, oh my gosh, oh my gosh, because, like, I am covering multiple offices tomorrow I think I might be covering two, possibly three, maybe more, who knows. I just say, say yes when people ask if someone can cover, if I'm in the office, like, oh yeah, for sure I can cover, I need to stop saying that because it doesn't seem like a big deal until people actually reach out to me and ask for, like, consultation, and I'm like, oh right, I need to actually do work and make decisions, big decisions, not little decisions. These are big decisions, yeah, yeah, so that's fun. Anyways, that's what's happening for me tomorrow. What's happening for you how? How is your life going? You had a fun week last week. You had a little visitor. You weren't able to come here. You whore, I didn't have a visitor, you did. You had Michael.
Speaker 2:Oh yeah. So yeah, michael came to visit for a couple days and that was pretty fun, because he's a good time every time and we made cheesecakes. But then our friend was sick, right?
Speaker 1:How much have I told you about that? Nothing, because I don't know anything about our friend being sick. Okay, so one of Lauren's friends.
Speaker 2:So in Vancouver we have two sets of wives. So we have like one set of wives that are the doctors, and then the other set of the wives are kind of like more like our drag friends. They're really involved in the drag scene. Anyway, one of our drag friends a couple of wives her appendix exploded, yeah, but she like has a heart condition and she has like ulcerative colitis and her liver is kind of failing. So she's in a lot of pain all the time. So she didn't think it was that big a deal and her back hurt for four days but then she couldn't breathe. So they took her to the hospital and she, I think, was in the ER waiting to be seen for like nine hours with her appendix and they finally got her. They're like, oh, your appendix burst, um, but then all of her organs shut down. Well, yeah, because the infection went everywhere right well, yeah, like her liver wasn't that great.
Speaker 2:She had a bacterial infection of her heart that almost killed her when she was young. Her kidneys both shut down completely. She has a quite startling shade of yellow. When you go look at her like she looks like she's lizard eyes. All the whites are like yellow and like the doctor was like she needs multiple organ transplants immediately or like we don't know what's gonna happen. So that was pretty terrifying for her wife. So mostly we hung out with her wife and like helped her get some sleep and have some support and eat some food and like do some laundry and that type of stuff. Then we also spent a fair bit of time at the hospital, like watching drag race and playing cards and hanging out with her so she wouldn't be alone. Oh, that's really sweet. It's also like super stressful, though I don't know like she. By the time we got to see her she was out of the woods, basically like barely out of the woods but out of the woods. But like this is gonna affect the rest of her life and how she looks like um, yeah, jesus christ, it's insane. She's gonna be in there for a few more weeks.
Speaker 2:She had like six holes punched in her kidney yesterday because they were like well, your kidneys are getting better, but we don't know why. So we're gonna take six biopsies to help us figure out why. But then I guess like her kidney wouldn't stop bleeding internally. It's like it's it's a big old mess. Jeez.
Speaker 2:When people encounter stuff like that, it triggers all sorts like weird big picture stuff where you think about your life and you think about like, oh my gosh, is this what I want? All that uh huh, so that I had like a tiny little existential crisis. Oh no, oh dear. And then this morning our doctor friends one of them calls me. It's like having a small crisis. And then my dad calls me and he's like are you coming to your niece's birthday party tonight at your sister's? And I'm like I certainly, like I'm barely holding it together, but it's all fine, because my niece canceled the night before and then I canceled today, then my sister canceled on my dad. So then now we have to find another time for us to all get together.
Speaker 2:But that's what I was. I was supposed to drive all the way to where my sister lives today after cheese and crackers last night. So yeah, that's a lot and things are still pretty messed up and like I'm I don't know about you, but like do you really feel? And then all of a sudden you're like oh yeah, I forgot. I have like a weird like well of self-loathing from childhood. It's just like in there all the time and normally it doesn't bug me too much, it doesn't affect my life, I like live perfectly fine without it. Then, like usually twice a year sometimes more if it's a bad year, sometimes less, it's like an amazing year I'll like suddenly be reminded that, like where other people have like this warm, fuzzy safety in the middle of their body, I have like a weird hole. That's like you're worthless and no one loves you.
Speaker 1:Oh, my goodness, I mean like I hate to like call back to what we talked about before, but it sounds like you have a high ACEs score, my darling.
Speaker 2:I know Sounds like I have trauma. It's funny we talked about ACEs score because the friend who I counsel one of the doctors he was talking about how she just found out her ACEs score. Oh and so basically she had an Asian, a Chinese mom and a dad with some mental health stuff who wasn't present. But she was like I was so successful, like I was in summer school all the time and I learned how to play the violin and all my physical needs were taken care of, so like I had a really good childhood and then she's learning now and she can't support others emotionally. I'm like, oh man, it seems she's like maybe my childhood wasn't really really great.
Speaker 1:Yeah honey, I'm just happy that she's going to the bathroom in the litter box now. The win for me. I mean, where was she going before? She would go right next to the litter box and then I would have to clean it up every day. I was mopping the floor every day. It was driving me up the wall. And so I like she refuses to go in the automatic litter box now, unless I like put her in there myself and then I give her like those squeezy treats that you can get for cats. So I put her in there and I give her a squeezy treat and she eats the entire squeezy treat while she's in there, and then I do that like three times, three days in a row and then she'll use the automatic litter box as a litter box, but other than that, she just wants to go right next to it. So I actually bought like a crappy little like dollar store litter box and she uses that one right next to it, and then I just scoop it and put it in the automatic one and run a cycle.
Speaker 1:Wait, you didn't talk last week. I know that's terrible. We rarely miss a week, you know that right? Yeah, it's pretty crazy. I blame nothing, michael.
Speaker 2:I mean considering it's spring break, but I have like had 50% of my Wednesdays available Did.
Speaker 1:I do this.
Speaker 2:I'm supposed to be at a birthday party.
Speaker 1:You're supposed to be at a birthday party right now? Well, because she canceled it oh okay, yay, well, we are on the L word, episode six. Lawfully, not a lot actually happens. Season one, season one, episode six they open with a historical scene from 1979. There's gay men in a public bathroom and like they're doing what this ends.
Speaker 2:Oh, it's jim q losing it lawfully well, but then why can't I find? It, I don't know. Oh, elward, season one, episode six, this is when tim finds out what's going on. Oh yeah, that is okay, so something. Yeah, but that's jenny, I don't like jenny. A huge moment happened, I know, but it's jenny and I don't like her. Okay, but she's supposed to be our access point so they have the, the guys, the gay guys.
Speaker 1:And then the one guy, like they go and they do gay stuff in a bathroom and then the other guy is a cop and he revealed to be gay in 1979.
Speaker 2:That was the historical moment oh yeah, that announces something to her father. What does she announce?
Speaker 1:she's having a kid. Yeah, she announces that. Uh, that tina is pregnant. Um, yeah, tim was going for a swim meet and then he forgot his lucky stopwatch and then he had to go home.
Speaker 2:Oh, you want to go right now.
Speaker 1:On Marina. Oh, are you okay?
Speaker 2:Yes, but Lauren's just vacuuming the office really quickly, oh okay.
Speaker 1:Can Lauren come here and vacuum my house? Yeah, but she only vacuums carpet, yeah. And then Marina just walks out. And then Tim walks out, jenny follows him, causes a scene and she's like it was the first and she's like what happened between us was a terrible mistake. It will never happen again. I will never see you again. And then Tim was like, looked at Marina. He's like, tell me when it started. And she was like it didn't. You saw everything beginning in the end. It's like she's covering for jenny too, because she's um poor jenny and she's so tortured. She's such a, she's such a serious writer. Speaking of writing, uh, alice's mom writes her name on the chart oh yeah, who else's mom hung up with?
Speaker 2:she made out with shane oh yeah, that's a cute moment actually, yeah and it like becomes like a thing.
Speaker 1:Like further on, like even in, like generation q, it still becomes a thing. It's adorable, uh, but it's got, you're not. Bet, tina's got morning sickness, that's dad is in town, and then bet is mad at tina because tina told her dad that you know, or told kit that the dad is in town, and kit's like, oh, he never told me. Um, oh. But we also had the problem with dana, where dana was invited to a subaru event and she was like getting ready and whatever, and, and her agent was like you need to bring harrison. And then then Laura like shows up at her house ready to go.
Speaker 2:Yeah, and she didn't tell Laura that, like she wasn't going to be her date. Yeah, I'd be pissed too if I was Laura. Oh God, yeah.
Speaker 1:Not cool. Shane just talking about Alice's mom saying she came on to me and she's hot for an old person oh, but this is also where we meet Clive which one's Clive so, who is a hot mess and he is a twink and he is being passed around by the hollywood socialite. Okay, yeah, and him and shane had a past together where they worked the streets together. You can't see my air quotes on the podcast, but I'm putting air quotes in there. Yeah, yeah, so we get introduced to clive. I forgot about clive. Honestly, I guess he's not really that important in my life, but like he was important in shane's life.
Speaker 2:Yeah, I forgot about him too. Oh, thanks, babes.
Speaker 1:And this is also where, like, shane points out to him like hey, these men don't act like because these men want to hang out with Shane because she's like the most androgynous out of everyone and she like tries to explain, like no, they want to hang out with me because they think that I'm a little boy and I'm not a little boy, so Shane's getting like mis I mean like yeah, it is what it is, but like she's not she's still pretty well.
Speaker 1:This is like intro to butchiness for the like 2000s, true before mask was a word, yeah, back when butch was the word, because they use the word butch in later seasons. It's still a word, for sure, but like people, really I find kind of lean towards mask a bit more. Yeah, oh, you know what else I have to do? What I have to boil eggs because it's Easter and so we need to boil eggs so that this weekend we can dye eggs, so that we can put the eggs in our Easter basket, so that the Easter bunny knows which Easter basket belongs to who. That's pretty cute, though, like I remember growing up, becoming older and thinking traditions were stupid, and now, as an adult with a kid, I'm like, oh no, they weren't stupid, they were amazing.
Speaker 2:They're just not for single young people.
Speaker 1:Right, right. Also, we get to find out if these eggs are even, like, viable to be boiled for a question I'd normally have I mean like did you see the bridge?
Speaker 2:oh that the bridge collapsed. Yeah, what the fuck.
Speaker 1:That was pretty fucking wild, hey so, like I saw it shortly after it happened, because I was just I'm chronically online and it came on my tiki-taki and I was like oh, whatever, this is just some people doing some like fake shit, whatever deep, fake AI, whatever, uh. And then it wasn't, it's real.
Speaker 2:The bridge collapsed yeah, and there's like six people in an unaccounted for yeah, which is really sad.
Speaker 1:Yeah, come on, come on, don't float, please don't float, please don't float oh why is it bad? Because when eggs float, it means they've gone bad oh, I see and I have farm eggs.
Speaker 1:I always have to do the flip test. That one's bad, only one, so that's not too bad. And that's why I have two dozen, because then with two dozen, I will boil 14 eggs. Two of them will probably break. Well, that one's good. And if none of them break, then I will just eat hard-boiled eggs tomorrow. All right, I've got 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14. There's 14 in there.
Speaker 1:And then you add vinegar, because it makes it so they don't break. Apparently I don't fucking know. Something that my mother has done my entire life is add vinegar to the boiling eggs. So I do it too. I mean like I. Then, once that comes to a boil, then you turn it off and you wait for 13 minutes, and then you dump out the water and you pour in cold water with ice. 13 minutes seems like a long time. Well, yeah, but you've turned the heat off. It's perfect boiling. I like them with the middle part still running. Oh yeah, if I wasn't dying them, it could be an option, but they're going to sit on the counter for a couple days hole in the bottom and then blow all the egg out oh, no, no, no, then it's just hollow.
Speaker 1:I guess they break a lot easier like that, though. Yeah, no, no, no, no. Uh, also, my child has really gotten into playing video games. Which one? Uh, playstation 3 video games, oh fun, right. So like I found all my old video games and like I'm ordering video games off of the internet, and so he really likes playing little big planet too. Um, I have portal 2. I think I need to get portal 1, like I need to get like the orange box portal's amazing, right. Um, because portal 2, though, is kind of it's it's hard, it's really hard to figure out. Like I struggle with it. Oh, my god, do you know what I'm doing? What talking about? How spring?
Speaker 2:breaks almost over. I'm not looking forward to going back and having 30 at a time there, although I am officially going to do my master's oh, look at you, go, I don't. What am I going to do, like when there's like a baby around? Fuck that. I can do it while we're pregnant, but I can't do it Like when we have like a newborn.
Speaker 1:Yeah, no, 10 out of 10. Do not recommend. I mean, like, completing school while pregnant. In school that were pregnant. But yeah, once that baby comes, like especially the first, what three months? You don't sleep. You don't sleep for the first three months. I know you don't have to tell me I'm not excited, but they're cute. They're cute for the first little while and then they're assholes and then like they're irritating but you still love them. But then, like around six years old, they start becoming fun. Ages and stages, ages and stages I just I like, like six was when he was really starting to understand, like we really got into board games and he was able to kind of understand rules to board games and so I had a lot of fun. But it also depends on, like, what you like to do. Like if you enjoy going for hikes, then the first few months are amazing because you just put them in a little sling in front of you and pack them up the mountain with you. So that's, that's, that's good. It just depends on what you like.
Speaker 2:Yeah, I don't know what I'm like. Well, I'm serious and I don't like wasting thousands of dollars and nothing happening, which is what I'm currently doing. Oh, is there still nothing happening? Yeah, our last attempt just failed yesterday. Oh, no, yeah, not ideal. What can you do? Just keep trying. Yeah, feel better that you know I'll try to occur, rather than me have to take out my eggs, although now, with ivf possibly being rolled out next year for one family, like one time for family. Um, I probably wait until that goes through to get it for free.
Speaker 1:Yeah, that's right, it is one one round right.
Speaker 2:Yeah, but I produce so many fucking eggs almost like an eggy lady, so should be fine. So what does that mean?
Speaker 1:like you get one round of IVF, but like the expensive part is harvesting the eggs.
Speaker 2:expensive, um, but like it about $14,000 to get the eggs harvested and then like up to an additional $10,000 to $15,000 if you're doing like fertilization and then keeping it stored and then genetic testing and then implantation and then all the hormones and all the procedures, right. So $25,000 to $30,000 for like a full thing. Did you successfully get diagnosed with ADHD by a doctor?
Speaker 1:Yes, uh, what do you mean? How? I went in and I said, hey, I think I have ADHD. And then what? And then she was like, okay, fill out this questionnaire. And it was that like generic, like really short questionnaire, um. And so I took it home and I filled it out and I thought it was funny because the first question was, uh, you talk excessively? And it was already marked off. Yes, that is funny. It is funny.
Speaker 1:And so when I went back and I sat down to talk with her about it and then she was like she's laughing. She's like first question is funny. And I was like, yeah, the first question is funny. I'm like did you, did you just want me to know that? You think I talk a lot? And she was like what are you talking about? And I was like, because the first question is did you talk excessively or something, something akin to that, like I don't know what the actual wording was before you gave it to me and she looked and she laughed. She said that's question two. Question one is do you miss small details? And you didn't answer it. That's funny. So like, apparently after that you don't need to do any like further testing.
Speaker 1:And then we went through different medications and whether or not my symptoms got better or worse. Surprise, surprise, they got better. And then she was like, yeah, sounds like you have ADHD, which was really actually handy because we went through this when my kid was like baby, baby and there is a significant genetic component to adhd. Yeah, and his dad was diagnosed as a child with adhd, never got medication or anything for it, but he was diagnosed and so, with both parents having it, um, when I went to her and I was like you know what? I think the kid has it too and these are the ways that's affecting him, like at school, at home, in his social life, because at five years old he had a social life, but he did and it was affecting it. And she was like, yeah, let's try out the same, like she, and she said the same thing. She's like, yeah, there is a genetic component and we will try something else and we've adjusted and we've tried different meds and he takes um off-brand Vyvanse and it works for him.
Speaker 1:Off-brand Vyvanse made me go nuts. In what way? I got really, really mad and angry and I cried all the time, oh dear, yeah. But also like maybe that was just the stage of my life and maybe I should try it again because it works so well for him and like my medication doesn't actually work that well for me anymore. No, no, I feel like it's not as effective and that now I just get snippy when I'm on it. I mean, I can focus, but I get snippy and I don't like getting the sneak. Why do you get snippy? I don't know, I just get like like I snap at people. Is this boiling, yet do you think that counts as boiling? Oh, one broke, oh, but if that's it, that's fine. Only one breaks.
Speaker 2:I talked to my doctor about it and he just said that everybody thinks they have it. It's widely, wildly over diagnosed and that I don't have it. And that was like the end of that conversation. What a dick.
Speaker 1:I'm sorry, the fact that you said that he's a him skewed my perception, because women and men present with ADHD much differently, and adults also present much differently than kids.
Speaker 2:Well, and also like some children were heavily punished for like acting according to their instincts and so you just get really good at ignoring how you feel. Yeah, I guess every time I hang out with my friends, that's all they talk about. I don't know if that's what. Like everybody's friendship circles are like Like what if that's every millennial's conversation where everybody self-diagnoses? If that's what people do on a Saturday night when you're in your 30s and then we all talk to each other that we do.
Speaker 1:I think that people who have the same thing going on in their brain kind of find each other together. Yeah, because you know what? It's a whole hell of a lot easier to talk to somebody who has ADHD, because you can like completely ping pong in your conversation with them and it's okay, here we go. Okay, turn that off. Set a timer 13 minutes. Are you going to set the timer? Still working, still working. Oh, there we go.
Speaker 2:Some places require you bring in your elementary school report cards.
Speaker 1:Uh-huh, but like yeah, because it has to be present from the time that you're a kid, but like also you can. I don't know. My doctor knows my family though. Like, which might be helpful.
Speaker 2:Did you suffer in elementary school?
Speaker 1:Uh-huh Did you Uh-huh, what was that? Like, um, I got bored. If I got, if like was learning something, I would get a hundred percent. But then as soon as it was a repeat, I got like I fucked it up. Oh, anything that took prolonged attention, if it wasn't super interesting, I failed it. Yeah, book report sucked unless it was a good book yeah, maybe it's, then maybe it's a no for me.
Speaker 2:Then you a lot of money to get diagnosed. Is it well if you pay for it yourself, like if your doctor won't do it for you, you have to pay for it yourself. It's like a1,000 and takes like a year.
Speaker 1:Oh my God, that's so ridiculous I am I don't know, maybe I'm just lucky. Like I know that there is like not a resurgence, but there is. Like there are a lot of people who are getting diagnosed lately because the information is available and like this is kind of the first time that people have had this information available. So of course they're like, oh, everybody just wants the medication.
Speaker 1:But like, like, even the last time that I went to go see my doc before I got my vitamin B12 deficiency diagnosed, which was not, I don't know check, but they checked it I have done but before that, when I told her like hey, I stopped taking my meds because, like I have heart palpitations and I'm not doing well and blah, blah, blah, and she was like, well, what do you do with your meds? I but like they're just kind of in my cupboard. And she was like, oh, okay, as long as you're not selling them. And I was like who the hell would sell these? Like these are not fun. There is no fun time when I'm taking them, but if you don't have ADHD, they're fun to take.
Speaker 1:In what way I don't know. Apparently, it makes people feel high. I wouldn't know, because I have ADHD.
Speaker 2:I mean I've taken Lauren's before. I didn't feel high.
Speaker 2:So then it sounds like you have ADHD If you take it a lot, done A lot, or like a normal amount, no, like kind of like an excessive amount, like I did schoolwork for six hours straight, but also, I needed to do it. It was due the next day and I had only one day to do it and I had supposed to have been doing it for several months. Oh, did you get it all done in six hours? Oh, I don't know, I don't know if that, but no, I don't. I never struggled in elementary school. In fact, I was pulled out of class to go sit with the other annoying kids because we were okay, but those are also ADHD kids you're annoying because you got everything done and then I'm.
Speaker 1:Then you're annoying everyone that's ADHD, but I, but I never.
Speaker 2:but I then? I, I liked everything, though Like I didn't fail anything.
Speaker 1:No, you don't fail anything. I didn't. I mean like I only failed when I wasn't interested, but like you don't fail, you can finish everything. That's that's that's what my kid does when he's not medicated. He finishes everything, he does it right, and then he pisses everybody off because yeah, but that's because.
Speaker 2:I'm just faster than the other kids.
Speaker 1:No that's because you have ADHD.
Speaker 2:Well, I don't know. I don't know because originally I thought it was autism, but then I was looking at things that they both have in common. When I look at stuff that's just autism, I don't have those. When I look at stuff that's like things that both ADHD and autism like the overlap, I have a lot of them and I'm still not 100% sure that it's Component you have it in your family.
Speaker 2:Well, do I, though? Because nobody's been diagnosed Really, yeah, not officially. Oh, because it costs $1,000 and takes a year. I don't know how you got your doctor to do it.
Speaker 1:I don't know, because she knows me, she's known me, my entire life.
Speaker 2:Yeah, when I went overseas, my family doctor like so that I was's a new guy actually terrible. Oh well, yeah, you always handed in your homework, karen, I did. You passed all your classes.
Speaker 1:I did okay, so I never failed, but like I didn't get good marks when I wasn't interested, that's true.
Speaker 2:I remember I got detention once, just the one, and it was because I didn't hand in a single piece of homework all year. But I got A's on all the tests and then I would end up with like a solid B for my final grade and that was, I think, miss Martin. I think it was Miss Martin that pissed her off so bad she gave me detention, which was just more sitting in a chair, but downstairs this time, right in the drafting room.
Speaker 1:Yeah, but that's just my work. I've got nothing to do, I. But detention was at lunch. It wasn't after school, which was weird.
Speaker 2:Well, cause kids have buses and stuff, cause it's a rural place. You can't cut kids off from their only way to get home. True, but then I didn't have to tell my parents that I ever got detention. Same. My mom never knew.
Speaker 1:What are you doing now Sweeping Cause I have oh, three minutes and 54 seconds.
Speaker 2:For the eggs weeks. Guess I'm gonna go see in april.
Speaker 1:What are you gonna go see in april? Are you gonna go see?
Speaker 2:jesus christ superstar and kamloops on april 12th. No, but I am gonna go see bianca del rio in colonna and, uh, the 10th. I don't know who that is. Oh, my god, you would like bianca del rio. She's my favorite drag queen, arguably like the successful to come out of the rue franchise. More important than being a drag queen, though she's an insult comic. Oh so it's gonna be a good time it is.
Speaker 1:I don't know if I would like to go to that.
Speaker 2:I don't like being insulted well, just look down to script. Well, I did just get my hair re-blended so I might have to wear a hat. I'm a woman over 35.
Speaker 1:No one cares if I'm there oh my goodness, the floors were disgusting. I'm not even gonna lie like they're bad. Do you want to know something?
Speaker 2:funny, what? Okay, so in my teaching program, um, when we like had like our graduation the final day, I won an award. What? Yeah, I won an award. Um, and I had to go up in the front they had like a plaque or like a, a thingy, a paper with my name on it and stuff to give me, and everyone clapped and it was like this big award I won. Yay, I won.
Speaker 2:Um, I don't remember what it was called or what it was for or where it went. So then like, apparently this is so fucking ridiculous. So I'm going through my stuff, looking for my notes to help a friend of mine try and transition into working in the school department, like school district, um, and I'm going through and I find something and I'm like, oh yeah, and there's my degree. And I'm like, but this kind of doesn't look like a degree. I thought it was a degree. I put it in like a frame and I framed it like it's in a frame from dollarama, like a picture frame, um, and I this whole time I must have looked at it like a thousand times I thought it was my degree. Uh, it's not, it's the award that I couldn't remember. And then I've been like trying to remember for years. Yeah, look well, you can't like, but come on, look anyway I'm coming, I'm coming, I'm coming, I'm coming.
Speaker 1:Yeah, ubc, wait what really like?
Speaker 2:it's a real award yeah, oh, for my valued contributions to the teacher education program. And it wasn't like a five people one-edger for second, third place, it was just me. Holy crap, that's amazing. And that was the same practicum that my practicum teacher wanted to fail me on different aspects, the one that got you blacklisted, the one that no longer is allowed to have student teachers. Oh shit, and like maybe it was a pity award because I'd been through it. But I don't know.
Speaker 2:I had that in my fucking document for nine years and I never read it. I just realized like it can't be my degree, because degrees usually have fancy lettering, you know like scripty handwriting stuff, and they usually have like a little, a little golden circle, a stampy seal thing on them that looks like golden tinfoil and it was like well, that's weird, this looks like someone made it on Microsoft Word, because they did, but it's still a real award. Yeah, I'm so glad I found it Because now I can put it on my resume. This whole time I've been applying for jobs and wanting to put it on my resume but I can't remember what it was called or what I won it for, or like Aw, precious, yeah, the month I have to apply for my master's. Oh, we took our cats to the vet. One of them, the thyroid condition, is getting worse and the other one is going to cost 1800 to clean her teeth. Oh, dear lord, I mean the cat's teeth even matter that much uh, I don't know, my sister got her cat's teeth.
Speaker 1:My sister got all her cat's teeth taken out. But then how does the cat eat? Uh, it just eats soft food. That seems very cool, I mean, like cats are supposed to only eat soft food anyway.
Speaker 2:Ours mostly just eat tuna and stuff. Right, she's got expensive teeth, but she's also got heart murmur, so we kind of have to keep them, because you can get heart disease through your gums.
Speaker 1:Yeah, you can. I know a guy who got that. Actually, yeah, he never brushed his teeth and then he had pericarditis and it was because he never brushed his teeth. I know, crazy, what a crazy girl. And I see it was, um, your nephew's birthday too. Do you want to know how old they are? No, no, nope, don't even do it. I mean, like you want to guess how old they are. Oh, five, five children. You are allowed to be five, according to Marika Dodge, mm-hmm. Do you want to go outside? Do you want to go outside? Meow.
Speaker 2:He's so ferocious, he's a panther. I definitely said that to Grey Cat today in honor of you.
Speaker 1:Are you ferocious? Are you a panther? Are you Apex Predator? Are you a saber-toothed tiger? Yes, you are. Look at you. Oh, my goodness, I am quivering with fear.
Speaker 2:Are you?
Speaker 1:okay, you know we have our conversation that we have every time that I talk to him. It is the same conversation, and I have to let him know that he is a very ferocious animal and that I'm afraid of him. And so when I see him I am quivering with fear because he's so ferocious. And then I get Callie. You know what she did this morning? Oh my God, because when you have a cat, oftentimes you will also have cat toys, including those little fucking mice, right, those little mice that are like catnip mice.
Speaker 1:This morning she was hungry because she's on a diet, because she's so fat. She brought me her mouse mouse. I don't know if she was trying to trade for food, but she was annoying me and I was like, oh wait, because it's 4 30 in the morning. And then I like reached my hand over and I grabbed this like furry thing and I was like, oh, what the fuck? Uh, and it was one of her catnip mice that she put it by my head, oh, and I mean, like I'll come home and she'll have like found a few mice, like toy mice, and she puts, she puts them on my bed, yeah, and like I don't know if she's putting them on there for me because she thinks I can't hunt or she's just weird. But this time she definitely, like, brought it to me, put it next to my face and I think she was trying to barter for some food. Totally trying to barter for food, weren't you? Weren't you?
Speaker 2:Little Calypso, you're so pretty. I'm just doing disgusting math right now. What Are you ready for? The worst math in the entire world. Yes, I love math. Don't tell anybody. Actually, I don't know how to do this math. Hold on, I'm not good at math. Okay, according to my calculations, so like every month I just looked at my paychecks and stuff Every month I make $8,960 gross, $960 gross, and every month I keep $4,556 net and according to my phone, that's 50%. Yeah, it is so the tax amount in Canada. What do people pay in Canada? I thought it was 13 or like 16.
Speaker 1:But the problem is it's not tax, it's not all tax. You're paying into your benefits, you're paying into your union. You're paying into all this other shit, yeah, paying into your benefits, you're paying into your union, you're paying into all this other shit, yeah. So, like, one of my previous partners made ten dollars an hour less than me, yeah, and their take-home was the same as mine because they didn't have to pay in as much as we do. But, that being said, I also acknowledge that, um, I do have a pretty sweet gig. I've got pretty good benefits. My, I have insane job security. Yeah, like, like when, when the government or when, when can when, when the when, when Canada goes through pardon me, if Canada goes through a recession, that's when our work increases. So we're recession proof. Nobody actually like jobs. Don't get cut.
Speaker 1:Like you would never walk in one day and find that you know you're getting handed a pink slip. Yeah, you would if you were doing Um, so I mean, like I also have like a decent amount of vacation. Um, I have basically unlimited not unlimited, but like I have a really decent amount of sick days. It equates to about six months straight. You could be sick for six months straight and be paid for sick days. I mean you only get paid at like 70 or 75%, but still, um, I get family illness days. I get two in a row family illness days. So those are special because they're your family. So you get paid at a hundred percent. But on the third day if you call in for a family illness, it's unpaid, but usually on the third day if you've been home with a sick family member, then you're sick. So you go on sick for yourself. Yeah, like it's as much as I'm like, oh, they take all the money away, but at the same time, like, I got good perks. The perks are worth it. Yeah, it's, it's, it's just it is, it's a decent job. But I did, oh, my god. Oh, I saw this guy, saw this guy on the tiki-taki. I was gonna send it to you and then I didn't. Uh, I don't know if I saved it. I didn't, I didn't save it, uh.
Speaker 1:So this guy is like very much anti, anti-government, anti, all that shit, like he's, he's. He's what is that red pill? Is that Red pill? That red pill? Yeah, okay, so he's that. I mean this is a decent cleanup, I think, um, he's that.
Speaker 1:And then he like posts on the internet and he's got this little video and he was like, hey, everybody who's struggling? You know who's not struggling right now? Canadian government workers. They're doing fine and blah, blah, blah.
Speaker 1:And he's like talking about how like everybody is struggling but the government workers are fine, and he's real angry about it. And at the end he's like so just go and apply for canadian government jobs. And he's like real angry and I'm just like, can you, can you please, please? We need workers. We are so understaffed. I would really like it, if you could, if people would apply for some government positions because we have no workers.
Speaker 1:And like he thinks he's doing something and uh, like really he's doing the opposite, because I really, really, really, really, really like if people would just randomly fucking apply for some jobs because I need some workers. Yeah, yeah, it's it's, oh, it's sad how we don't have any. And then like people like complain about how like services are taking too long and this taking too long, blah, blah. Well, yeah, it's taking too long. You know why? Because there's no workers, there is nobody to do the work. Yeah, nobody can uh process your application there, jimmy. Also, if you know anybody who wants to be a social worker. No, no, I can't wait to hide easter eggs for my workers. Like I'm genuinely excited. This weekend I'm gonna hide easter eggs in their little cubicles and they have to find them. I mean, like there's no candy in them, it's just like little lego pieces, but like it's still gonna be fun, I think yeah, maybe I'll do something just for me and michael here this weekend.
Speaker 2:He's going to come back on Saturday, like Thursday, friday for like me, to just sort of like chill, try and figure out how to submit an application. So, like for my master's, I need to have my personal education number, which I haven't looked at since 2006. So I just started the process of getting that on the government website, but it'll take like several days.
Speaker 1:You where you would have it, where, on one of your old essays that you wrote. Who has those old essay that I wrote?
Speaker 1:and at the very top when you do um apa format or mla format, whatever you have not mla really, oh well, I guess only apa format, because, oh yeah, we had to do apa format because it was social work and it was in the top left hand corner. Well then, that sucks, oh, oh. So here's the thing that I have for my e-reader it's a stand, yeah, and so I can like have it in the bath and like have it stand, oops, I can have it stand over me and then I have this thing.
Speaker 1:I don't know where it went. Oh, here it is. I have this thing and it changes the, not the channel it doesn't change the channel it changes the page.
Speaker 1:It flips pages for me by a little button on the remote. That's great, it really is. And then I can just like lay in the tub and like be changing pages, but like just like sitting, like with crisscross applesauce with my arms, or like I can be in bed, like laying in bed, and like have my e-reader like just hovering above my face and just be changing pages. And it's amazing and I love it so much and I have honestly found that when I do that to fall asleep, as opposed to like watching TikTok or YouTube or anything, I fall asleep faster and I sleep better.
Speaker 1:Okay, makes sense and, like now, I just really enjoy reading and I read an entire book the other day. Oh which one. It was called the Retreat and it was about a social media influencer who went on who, like, hosted a retreat at some place and then like nefarious things happened.
Speaker 2:I just finished Brandon Sanderson's Mistborn. It's a series of three and I'm really excited. Is it gay? Actually? No, I decided like the straight people are okay sometimes. There was this book series and then the guy died.
Speaker 1:Yeah, like what guy? The guy that was writing it, who wrote Wheel of Time? I don't know, robert Jordan.
Speaker 2:I feel what the fuck should I know? I don't know people, I'm super duper famous. You're super duper famous. Thank you, yeah, robert Jordan. Okay, so there was this whole book series. No-transcript about them. Get them get like. This is amazing, this is amazing, it's so good, it's so good, it's so good, it's so good.
Speaker 1:Um, and it's pretty great female main character, so that counts I mean like the one that I read too, also not gay, the Retreat not gay, but had a female main character as well. Like the majority of the main, all of the main characters are female actually, so I mean like kudos to them, even though it was not gay. I kept helping, though, and I was like, oh, are those two people going to bang? No, no, they're not. She's going to go for the man. Of course she's going to go for the man. She learned nothing from just flipping the laundry.
Speaker 2:But I'm going to let you go here. I need to eat and my head is starting to get really painful. I'm going to go take some. On that note, I love you a lot. Keep me posted. Yes, don't forget to text me.
Speaker 1:I'm still doing like nothing.
Speaker 2:Even when you don't reply to my little videos that I send you. Well, I just thought you were fancy schmancy thing.
Speaker 1:But I was like trying to show you like, hey, I'm reading it, but also look at this fancy schmancy thing.
Speaker 2:Yeah next time, send words and like pictures. Have a good evening.
Speaker 1:You too. I hope your headache goes away and that everything works out and everything will be okay. Give the cats a pet for me, Of course yours as well. Okay, I love you.